Short Stories – Resolve

He was walking along one of the streets of what used to be Pasadena. The buildings on the sides of the road were overgrown and he knew better than to try to enter any one of them. Well, that’s probably only partially true, he could enter any house he wanted. It’s just that he would need to carefully check every room and closet, then find a place with one entrance and watch that entrance. It was just easier in the open so, he kept on walking in the middle of a road with only coyotes and bears to worry about.

It really was not that bad when you thought about it. You just stayed in the open and if you knew how to stay away from coyotes, bears, and the crazies. So, he fixed his backpack and kept on going.

Were these buildings of Caltech? That’s where he was supposed to go to college until he decided it was too much work and it was much easier to live off his parents. But there was a fond memory that came out of there. It was after the Americas fall, when he was what? In his thirties? Yes, early thirties. He was hiding out from the raiders when he ran into this tiny little woman. He just shushed her and was about to keep on going, but she thought he was coming at her, so she laid him out and broke his nose. He could not even remember how it went from that to them having children together.

But even then, he still just found ways to do nothing. He would hide out most of the time, but he had this knack for finding the best supplies. Somehow, he could tell which house was already emptied and which not.

His mind was wandering between the memories and now, as he was making his way back. It was too dangerous to go into the city, thus he was making this run himself.

There was not much left to find, but Alan found this warehouse. It was locked in a building with no signs and had mostly canned and dry goods only. He found it a long time ago, but because it was too close to the heart of the city he tried to avoid going there. At least while they kept finding food elsewhere. Thankfully it really did not matter that much anymore.

They used to send a scavenging team for a run once a month, but now that their crops produced harvest, and potatoes looked like they would yield harvest as well they did not need much. Actually, soon they might not need these runs any more at all. It is just that eating the same vegetables, the same food all the time it eventually gets to you. Even to the point of risking your life making a run for some can goods.

Again, he adjusted his backpack. It felt like it was getting heavier and heavier with each step. But every time he thought of lighting the load he could see her little face with tears rolling down her cheeks saying ‘daddy, I want beans’, he pursed his lips and kept on going.

He saw movement to his right and froze. He dropped down to the ground and found a place to hide. It was one of the crazies lurking around. He could see the wounds where he had been bitten. It was not a problem being bitten on its own. The problem was that he did not get treated.

By now no one could remember who created the mellow virus. It had a neuro toxin that released a continues stream dopamine, serotonin, and oxytocin. There were some other chemicals too, not important what chemicals, but the effect was that a person just stopped noticing pain, anger, aggression and became completely complacent. The one thing they did not forget was hunger. And so, they wandered around till they would fall to one or another calamity. They were not dangerous per say, but they were hungry and a little bit too friendly and attracted the wildlife.

He chuckled noiselessly to himself. The crazies remind him of himself in his youth. When he looked back, that was what he looked like through most of his twenties. The only difference was that back then he wanted to party without caring about how much it hurt him. Wow, come to think of it the analogy was scary. Some military agencies saw how he and countless other youths behaved and decided that it could be weaponized. And it worked.

Even this crazy had one of the rat like creatures nibbling on him and just let it happen. Just like he did allow his no-good friends feed of him in his young age.

He shook it off. Time to find a way around. The crazies were just one of the products of this war that all but stopped human civilization. The bombs and the attacks could not do it and stopped a long time ago and the real horror started – biological warfare. Like the little rat like critters that spread the mellow. Good thing that for one reason or another they avoided open spaces. That’s why he stuck to the middle of the road, even so here he could be spotted by the raiders.

There were so many diseases and viruses spread by those little critters, but thankfully only the mellow remained. Whoever created them made sure they did not reproduce in the wild, but the ones with the mellow managed to cross with the real rats and spread everywhere. Thankfully, the mellow diluted in the process and could be easily treated.

He took a deep breath and made his way around the crazy and was back on the way home. And he was almost thankful for this encounter, in case one of the more aggressive animals was following him, the crazy was much easier pray. It was a cold thought, but when you see most of the world’s population wiped out you become a lot more pragmatic about those kinds of things.

He hated the people that thought of using animals as weapons.

He felt so tired, his whole body hurt, his heart pounded, but he had to get home. So, whenever he felt like letting go, he would think about his little beauty saying ‘daddy, I miss beans’. And yes, kids cried about all kinds of things, but this one stuck with him. Or maybe he just decided that he would use this as his inspiration. Does not matter. He would steel his mind and would move on.

He took one more last look at the Caltech building as it disappeared in the distance. How long has he been walking? He could not remember. But he could remember when she said ‘I am Joann, nice to meet you’ just a few minutes after she broke his nose. He remembered it like it was now. He thought she was the prettiest woman on earth.

When finally, he reached the gate a man that guarded it looked at him in surprise. I guess he could not blame him. Yes, they all thought he was crazy when he was leaving. It was mostly because no one expected him to come back.

“Holly crap!” The gate guard exclaimed. “The geezer made it back!”

They opened the gate and as he walked down the street people followed him. They tapped him on the shoulder, smiled and said things like ‘amazing’ or ‘great job’.

He did not notice most of it. He thought of that moment when the little girl started crying and the doctor spoke the words ‘congratulations, you are a father to a healthy girl!’ and his wife exhausted but smiling.

He reached his hut and entered to find his daughter leaning over a pot of vegetable stew. She looked back at him with surprise and turned back to her pot.

It’s not that she did not care. She did. She begged him not to go, but of course he did not listen. He was sure that she assumed he was leaving to die. You see, lately he has had a hard time keeping up and sometimes he forgot things. Like where he was or what year it was.

When he looked at her, he could still see the little girl that she once was. And he looked back with fondness at the nights that she screamed from dusk to dawn and his wife finally collapsed in exhaustion. He could not tell when that lazy, good for nothing youth transition into a father, all he could recall was that he would take her in his arms and all the rest of the world would fade into the distance.

But now he got old. He was older than anyone in this village by a generation and he felt that he was a burden on his family. He tried his best. He worked hard and tried to be out of the way, he even tried to eat just the foods that no one else liked. But still, he felt that he was a weight on his family, and it weighed on him heavily.

He took his bag down and started putting his loot on the table. It was a lot. It was so much more than he thought he would find. There must have been more than forty cans.

“Oh my gosh!” exclaimed his son in law as he just stepped through the door.

He was staring at the treasure that he laid out on the table. It was a treasure. They are probably not even going to eat most of it. They will sell it or trade it, no matter what it will help them a lot and he could feel better. This was like gold.

“How did you do it?” his son-in-law asked with what looked like tears in his eyes.

He had nothing to say. He did not realize it was that much either. At the moment, even if he wanted to say anything he was just too tired. His heart was beating so fast he needed to sit down.

“Grandpa!” A little girl ran into the room. She ran up to him and hugged him. “Mama said you went on a great walk, and you will not be back any time soon!”

His heart started to slow down, but it was good he did not need to stand up, as the girl was sitting on his lap.

“I wanted to, but then I remembered you and I had to turn back. I needed to hug you one more time.” He spoke with a smile.

“But you back? You not leaving again!” The girl said and hugged him.

“I love you.” He said back to her. “I just wanted to bring you some beans that you liked.”

The son in law already put away almost all the cans. But the one with writing bake beans was still out.

“How did you know I wanted it?” The girl said. “You are the best!”

She ran to the table, found the can of baked beans, and hugged it.

“Give it to me!” Said mom looking at her smiling daughter. “I will prepare dinner, if you help me and set the table.”

The little girl ran to the cabinet and took the plates one by one, set them on the table, while mom put the beans into the pan to heat them.

He sat at the table with a big smile and watched his family eat. All with smiles on their faces. He could not remember the last time he was this happy himself.

When the dinner was done, and the table was cleaned, mom was putting her daughter to bed. Her man came and hugged her.

“And how can I measure up?” He said in his wife’s ear.

“You do not have to compare yourself to my father.” she said lovingly.

“But that is not fare.” The husband spoke. “He is a respected husband and father. He always worked harder than anyone else. And now this.”

“Honey, you are an amazing father and husband, and stop comparing yourself to my father.” She said and kissed him.

***

He woke up when outside was already day, and the sun was up in the sky. He must have played xbox all night again, he thought to himself. Once he left home and started smoking weed, that was all he did anyway. At least since he stopped going to college and got a job at a fast-food place flipping burgers. You would think something happened to him, but really, he was just lazy. Even when his girlfriend dumped him, he did not get his life together. And yes, his parents did threaten to cut him off if he did not go back to college, but that was just too much work. Besides, they would not abandon him…

He got out of bed and tried to stand up. Wow, how much weed did he smoke last night? He was hurting all over.

But wait, it’s not right. He looked around and it all started to come back to him. The war, the love of his life, the life after. Slowly all seventy years of his life started to come back as he woke.

“Hey, pop’s, you awake!” A man spoke. Eventually, with a little trouble he identified him as his son-in-law. “We left your breakfast on the table.”

“Thank you.” He responded still feeling woozy.

He sat down to eat as the rest of his family left to work in the fields. He looked at the plate with what had been some kind of fried canned meat and eggs, and he remembered the trip. The terror of being out there all alone, with wild animals, crazies, and the raiders. He remembered how he barely missed each of those. How at least once the only reason he survived was pure luck.

He ate his breakfast and was going to go to the fields, but his son-in-law peaked his head.

“You relax pops. You deserve it. We got this.” He spoke and disappeared.

He walked out to see all his family working in the field in the distance. He remembered. He remembered it all. A tear was running down his cheek as he turned back into the house.

***

“Where is grandpa?” The girl asked the moment she came back home.

The girl’s mother walked after her, she looked around and she knew.

“He went on a journey.” She spoke softly.

“What journey?” The girl asked happily.

“The one I told you about.” Mother said.

“He will turn around.” The girl said, still smiling. “He will remember I wanted beans and come back.”

Mom said nothing back. Just a lone tear ran down her cheek.